Teen Shares Deployment Experience

By Elaine Wilson
Oct. 22, 2009
Elaine.wilson@dma.mil

Yesterday, I wrote about military children and the profound admiration I have for their strength and resilience.

In response, a Marine officer contacted me to share a letter his teenage daughter, Meagan, wrote shortly after he had returned from a deployment in support of Operation Iraqi Freedom. The letter describes how she and her family coped with the long separation.

The major and his wife found the letter on the Internet last year. He wrote that the letter is something they “will always cherish,” particularly because their daughter passed away in 2006.

I was touched by this family’s story and impressed by the maturity and wisdom Meagan displayed in her letter.

Meagan’s letter:

“My mom married a Marine almost five years ago when I was 10. My dad has been on a lot of short deployments and temporary assignments since we became a family. In five years, he’s been home for only one of my birthdays. Most of the time mom just signs his name on his birthday cards for us. I laugh with him later when I show him the present he got for me. This year, he was gone for over six months in support of Operation Iraqi Freedom.

“While he was in Iraq, there was the constant worry about his safety and fear that he might not come home. There is also the daily challenge of doing everything you usually do plus some of the stuff that dad used to do. Mom is a Key Volunteer (KVN) leader, so she was busier than ever and wasn’t able to do some of the things that she usually does. She got phone calls from spouses in the middle of the night on a regular basis. She was incredibly busy, and needed our help just to keep things up around the house. I have two baby sisters, so I took care of them most of the time so mom could get her work done.

 “Over the six months, we finally got into our own groove. Morning showers were on a tight schedule and in a certain sequence, so that everyone could get out of the house on time. Our dining room table became the KVN library, and sticky notes became the new kitchen wallpaper. For me, each day was like the movie “Groundhog Day” – the one with Bill Murray where he can’t escape from reliving the same day over and over. Every morning the alarm went off at 5 a.m., I showered and ate and helped my sisters to get out of the door on time. After school, I started dinner, watched my sisters, did a load of wash or whatever needed to be done, and then collapsed in bed only to do the exact same thing the next day.

“When it was finally time for Dad to return, we were all really excited and happy but a little bit stressed out, too. All of the weird things we had done to survive (like making the dining room table into a library) now had to be undone. You want to do special things too, like make welcome-home signs and hang yellow ribbons, but you are still just trying to survive the days.

“I think I’ve grown up faster than most kids because my dad is gone so much, and mom depends on me to help. The first time I learned to mow the lawn was because dad was gone, and mom needed us to chip in more. You also are more aware of world events than other kids. You pay attention to the news, because it hits home with you.”